I was reading this this morning, and I felt full of remorse. I always hated writing and sending the mission trip letter, but everyone else did it, so I joined their ranks. I sent these letters out twice, but, by the time I went overseas for the third time, I realized I wasn't making the same sacrifices I was asking of others.
I was a college student with (what I thought were) tight finances. I had faith that God would bless my efforts, so instead of asking for money, I stopped shopping. I bought food and basic hygiene items and that was about it. I didn't even go to Target for a while because I realized I was spending money I didn't need to spend. I worked more hours at my part-time jobs at church and in the financial aid office. I shopped at Food 4 Less instead of Vons. You get the idea. Incredibly, in a relatively short period of time ( a year or so), I was able to save the money I needed for my trip. I planned ahead and made it happen. I know this isn't possible for everyone, but I'm afraid it's more possible than we'd like to admit.
I was told it was a blessing for others to tangibly be a part of my trip, and I was robbing them of that blessing if I wasn't allowing them the opportunity to support me. Bologna. A few people did approach me and tell me they wanted to support my trip financially. I swallowed my pride, and I allowed them to help. I didn't beg for it, and it still came.
I feel like I need to send out a letter apologizing for my mission trip letters. Or at least talk to those relatives who only heard from me when they got graduation announcements and mission trip letters. They must think very little of me.
7 comments:
Good point Sherry!
I had a similar conviction when going overseas this summer even though it wasn't exactly a missions trip. I did ask for money from a few people, but for the most part I cut all extras out of my life and saved!! It really is possible. I think the problem is that most of us aren't taught how to manage our money long term. We see the Starbucks and want it not realizing the 15 Starbucks drinks we down that month will add up to $60!!!
Good blog food for thought.
I wish I could give back all that money. I don't have any doubts about the sincerity of my own efforts and others givings, but...I don't feel good about it now.
Hey Sherry,
Good post. I certainly agree, that I flippantly spent my money in early college and then asked others to give towards my trip. I feel somewhat bad, but not horrible. For me, there were a lot of things I look back on in early college that I did and wouldn't do now. I chalk it up to learning, growing, life experiences and conviction. No body was forced to give towards my trips; they willingly gave. The same as now when we have the opportunity to give: we don't give because we have any knowledge that the person is stellar with their money, but because I beleive in what they are doing and want to support them. If someone gives out of guilt, that is not my fault. It is hard to see the big picture and responsibility of finances in early college and these trips are great ways of opening our eyes to how much we do have, how spoiled we are, ect. It is not a perfect system, just like we are not perfect people, but I personally don't think that the letter writing is horrible. I DO agree that it would be best though to be taught the seriousness of how we spend our money, and that asking for money from people for a trip is a large integrity issue. And ideally, one should work very hard at saving and financing their own trips.
I feel the same about adoption for us. I would love to adopt right now, but we have no money to contribute. So we'll wait, rather than depending on everyone else to finance it.
Thanks. Sorry its so long.
I wish I could pay for your adoption, Steph. Keep in mind that if you adopt through fostering, the state pays the adoption fees. Of course, we all know that that's a long journey, and it requires much patience.
Yes, we've considered doing it through foster care, but knowing (through your journey!) that it is so unpredictable with time, we don't think we should until we're settled somewhere. Our timeline of being in Illinois is kind of up in the air. Thanks for wishing you could pay for it though :) I'm glad you had a good first day. I hope you don't get too tired this first week.
Being one who encouraged you to write those letters I believe I was also one who asked that the first one hundred dollars be given by self prior to asking others:).
I think the sad part is such as you shared when that letters asking for funding are the ONLY communication between certain parties.
Purpose within a community is undervalued. Giving is part of community. A community that focuses on Christ has no regret in giving to one and in taking from one when they know that the task at hand is for HIS GLORY!
With all that said, I have to admit that I have personally never sent out letters. During my own college years I simply worked 40 hours a week at a miniature golf course to pay for my mission trips. So there you go.
Question for TW: Would you be where you are today if you hadn't?
Keri,
As I was writing this, I was remembering you talking to us about the importance of personal sacrifice and the integrity involved in writing such letters (and I should have mentioned it in my post). It was no fault of yours, but my own immaturity that kept me from seeing my ability to make greater sacrifices. Surely, there are many students who could not have gone, were it not for writing the letters. I don't think I was one of them.
You did a great job of making sure we understood what we were asking!
-S
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