That feeling.

I can't shake this anxious feeling.

I turned off the T.V. on Friday, realizing that I couldn't bear the images. I just couldn't see one more sobbing mama or scared child.

Dropping Klara off at daycare this morning felt like tearing my heart out. The unsecured door, with nobody nearby to see who comes and goes, always bothered me. This morning, it felt like a death trap.

I know that I won't always be able to protect her.

I know that there will be times when we have to be apart.

I know that staying home and keeping her near just can't happen--even though there's nothing I want more.

More importantly, I know there are families who can't turn off the images.

If I feel like this, how much more must they be living a nightmare?

I'm grieving with them, knowing that my grief doesn't compare.

And it sure feels like a lot.